


Enough

by RaeDMagdon



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Eating out, F/F, Fingering, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Oral, Vanilla, andromeda spoilers, i will never be over shiara, maybe possibly a baby but that's up to reader interpretation entirely, melding, sap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-04
Updated: 2017-07-04
Packaged: 2018-11-23 08:40:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11399034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaeDMagdon/pseuds/RaeDMagdon
Summary: Liara suddenly understood that she was the shield, the eye of the storm, the small piece of untouched ground that remained. Even while she was falling apart, she was Shepard’s source of strength. Just as Shepard was hers. Perhaps she was not so useless after all.





	Enough

**Author's Note:**

> I'll never be over Shiara. Just saying. Please follow @raedmagdon on tumblr if you want.

Liara lowered her head and closed her eyes, looking away from the glowing screen of her terminal. Her hands trembled over the haptic interface and her shoulders ached with weariness, but she knew she needed to shake those feelings off. There was still so much to do: agents to deploy, reports to read, messages to send, final steps to take before…

_ … before the Milky Way is gone forever. _

She would call it a nightmare, except the chilling reality rarely allowed her the luxury of sleep. It was almost incomprehensible. Every place she had ever been, every person she had ever met—gone, forever. Wiped out completely. Soon, the entire galaxy might be reduced to nothing, with only scraps of their once-great civilizations left behind for future archaeologists to find.

_ Assuming the Reapers don’t destroy my messages, too. _

She had done her best to seed the capsules on as many planets as possible, but there were no guarantees. The Reapers had proven terrifyingly… efficient… at destruction. Even if a few copies survived, future scientists might not be able to understand her message. Her warnings could very well disappear along with everything else.

Liara opened her eyes again, blinking rapidly to prevent them from welling up with tears. There wasn’t time to cry. Not for herself, for Shepard, for Thessia, or for the end of everything. If there was to be any chance, she needed to focus her mind and help Shepard. That was the only way.

She returned to the terminal’s interface, bringing up her remaining list of tasks. Reading through them, they all seemed trivial. It would be several hours yet before the Normandy reached Sanctuary, and there was nothing she could do to prepare for the mission in the meantime. She doubted Kai Leng had left many traces behind. Fate would be cruel indeed if Shepard brought a ground team to the refugee camp only to find bodies and no leads.

Until they arrived at Sanctuary, Liara knew, she was all but useless. Perhaps her shipments and reports might keep the darkness at bay for a little while longer, but the end result would be the same. The Reapers would devour everything in their path until it was gone. Forgotten.

Her gaze settled on one particular item in the middle of her list: a message she had been avoiding. A message she had composed on her datapad only to delete it several times over. It was not a particularly urgent communication, but it was important—important enough to weigh heavily on her for the past several weeks. She had put it off more than once already, always with the excuse that she had no time, but time was something they were rapidly running out of anyway.

It might as well be now.

Liara turned away from the terminal, pinching the bridge of her forehead with one hand and reaching for her water bottle with the other. After a moment’s thought, she dug a few pills out of her lab coat pocket too. The Normandy’s entire crew was running on stimulants and desperation these days, but even so, they were frayed and threatening to snap. No one slept. Especially not Shepard.

_ Shepard. _

She knew all too well the sacrifices her bondmate made, over and over again. Shepard worked longer, fought harder, and carried more weight than any of them, all without crumbling. Had she been in Shepard’s place, Liara wasn’t certain she could be half as strong. Watching Thessia burn had all but broken her. Shepard had been fighting this entire time with Earth in the back of her mind, with every species’ hopes pinned to her armor.

Liara took another swallow of water, then set the bottle aside again. Someone needed to know. Needed to know what Shepard had done, what she was trying to do. After everything Shepard had given to this fight, it deserved to be remembered, even if they lost.

“Glyph, please record a message for Alec Ryder of the Andromeda Initiative.”

The small drone whirred as it came to hover at her side. “Yes, Dr. T’Soni. Please begin your message.”

Silence filled the cabin as Liara realized she still had no idea what to say. She should have felt like a foolish student who hadn’t completed her homework, but instead, all she felt was emptiness. These might be the very last words anyone heard from the Milky Way.

She paused. Took a breath.

“Hello, Alec. This is Liara T’Soni and the year is 2186. I don’t know if you’ll even receive this message, but we corresponded years ago. I remember you spoke about a plan to settle Andromeda.”

A small smile spread across Liara’s face. The news had excited her then, as an archaeologist as well as an individual. Although she loved the Milky Way and its history too dearly to leave herself, the idea of travelling to distant stars, to a whole new galaxy with brand new forms of sentient life, had thrilled her. She hoped that, somewhere, Alec Ryder and the Andromeda Initiative were doing just that, travelling to see wonderful things beyond the bounds of imagination.

Then her smile fell away.

“I don’t know if your arks made it out of the Milky Way, but… the worst has happened here.”

A tight ball formed in her throat, hard and stinging.

“I’m with Commander Shepard and a brave crew.” Her voice broke on her lover’s name, just a little—broke again when she spoke of the Normandy’s crew. They were so much more than just crewmates now. Fighting for the galaxy had forged them into a family.

“We’re trying to build a weapon to turn the tide, but… I fear that the civilization you remember, the people of the Milky Way as you knew them, could be gone forever. You may be all that’s left.”

The thought should have comforted her, the faint hope that the Milky Way’s people would live on in a new home far from the Reapers and their destruction, but she could find no warmth in it. She could only dwell on what would be lost.

_ Thessia, gone. Normandy, gone. No more Garrus, Tali, or Wrex. No more Ashley or James. No more EDI, no more Joker. No more Shepard. No life after the war. No little blue children. _

“Please,” she whispered, forcing the words out past unshed tears, “don’t forget us. Keep us alive in your hearts, and tell your children of the wonders that once were. On behalf of the crew of the Normandy SR-2, this is Dr. Liara T’Soni, signing off.”

She struggled to compose herself, preparing to ask Glyph to end the recording, but there was no need. Instead, the door to her cabin hissed open.

“Liara?”

Liara didn’t have to look. She would have known that voice, that presence, anywhere. Besides, Shepard was the only one with access to her room.

“Hello, Shepard.” Liara sniffed quietly, trying to hide some of her emotions by turning toward Glyph. “Glyph, please tell EDI to broadcast that recording when she gets the chance. She’ll be able to determine which comm buoy has the highest likelihood of—”

“Liara.”

Shepard stepped into the room, boots thudding softly across the floor. Liara’s eyes remained fixed on some distant point past her, or perhaps through her. She wasn’t sure she could look into her bondmate’s eyes. Then there would be no chance of holding back the tears.

_ She has suffered so much more than I have… fought so much harder… and I’m the one crying. _

“Glyph?” Shepard said. “Sleep mode.”

“Commander Shepard, you do not have authorization—”

“Sleep mode, buddy. Liara, tell Glyph to give us some privacy.”

Shepard’s voice had just a hint of humor in it, humor Liara didn’t know how she could possibly summon at a time like this. An hour ago, Shepard had prowled the war room like a cornered animal, clawing for any lead she could get. Apparently, the fact that they were going to Sanctuary was good enough… for now, at least.

“Glyph, activate privacy mode.”

Glyph retreated to his corner, his blue lights dimming.

Liara looked up.

Shepard was less than an arm’s length away, looking at her with concern. Her face was pale, her freckles standing out more than usual, green eyes glassy with exhaustion. “I was hoping you’d be asleep.”

“Sleep? I believe I’ve read about this ‘sleep’ in a fellow scientist’s dissertation once. The scientific community cannot agree on whether such a concept actually exists.”

Shepard forced a soft chuckle. “Smartass.”

Liara smiled a little. That had been a joke between them once—the first time Shepard had said it on the SR-1, Liara’s translator had done a basic word-for-word equivalency. She had spent several hours wondering why Shepard believed her backside was intelligent before soliciting the answer from a very amused Doctor Chakwas.

“If you were smart, you would be sleeping yourself, Shepard.”

“Can’t.”

Liara’s eyes widened slightly.

“Nightmares.”

With a sigh, Liara closed the last of the distance between them. She dipped forward, resting her forehead on Shepard’s shoulder. Shepard curled an arm around her waist, exhaling deeply.

“This is it, isn’t it? The beginning of the end.”

“Something like that,” Liara murmured into Shepard’s uniform shirt. “But perhaps it isn’t the end of everything. I just sent a message to Alec Ryder of the Andromeda Initiative.” She looked, but there was no recognition in Shepard’s eyes. “Five arks, with one hundred thousand souls aboard. Humans, asari, turians, salarians… even krogan and quarians and hanar. They’re headed for the Andromeda Galaxy.”

“Enough to keep the population going. Do the Reapers know anything about this?”

“Not that I am aware. I have been watching.”

With a kiss to her temple, Shepard pulled back. “Wish they’d had room for two more.”

“You don’t mean that, Shepard.”

“No… no, I don’t. I couldn’t leave. And I know you couldn’t, either. We need to see this thing through.”

“We will,” Liara said, with confidence she did not feel.

“We will,” Shepard repeated.

For a little while, the only sound in the room was their shallow breathing and the constant hum of the engines.

“We could pretend,” Shepard whispered, grazing Liara’s cheek with the backs of her fingers. “Pretend we’re traveling in a ship to somewhere new. Somewhere safe.”

The hope in her bondmate’s eyes made Liara’s heart clench. She knew what Shepard was asking for. Just a few minutes of rest, a few minutes of comfort before the next drop. Goddess knows she deserved it.

“Okay.”

“What would you want to do in Andromeda? If you could have a fresh start?”

“I suppose they would use me for first contact efforts. Archaeologists have developed protocol for establishing communication with isolated civilizations—”

“Not what they’d ask you to do,” Shepard said. “What you’d want to do.”

Liara considered. “After all this? Settle down. Go somewhere I don’t need to carry a pistol.”

Shepard’s lips twitched. “You mean you want a home.”

_ A home.  _ W hen Liara closed her eyes, she could almost see it. Somewhere with large windows and a garden. Open space for children to play. Hers and Shepard’s.

“Liara?”

Liara suddenly realized that Shepard’s eyes were swimming, much like hers. “Shepard…”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t… I’m sorry I can’t give you that. If I had one wish besides stopping the Reapers, it would be—”

Liara kissed her. It was soft, close-mouthed. Both of their lips trembled.

“You give me enough, Shepard. You have already given me enough.” She ran her fingers through Shepard’s hair, petting the short red strands. “Please, don’t add me to the list of people you feel you have failed. You could never fail me.”  _ I feel as if I am the one who always fails you. _

Shepard’s arms wrapped around her, forming a protective circle. “If this is enough for you, it’s enough for me.”

They kissed again, slow and unhurried. Time was running out, but Liara could think of no better use for the rapidly vanishing seconds than this. If this truly was the beginning of the end, then this was the end she wanted.

_ I don’t regret this, _ she said with her eyes as she gazed at Shepard’s face—the strong square jaw, the thin white scar through her brow, the familiar constellation of freckles.  _ We might not have a future, but we have this. We have now. _

Even without the meld, Shepard seemed to understand. She brought her hands to Liara’s hips, gripping firmly, and Liara draped both arms around her neck. Shepard lifted her, and Liara wrapped her legs around Shepard’s lean waist, catching her lips again.

Liara savored Shepard’s taste as her bondmate carried her to bed, trying to memorize the heat, the flavor. She remembered their first almost-kiss, over three years ago while the SR-1 was grounded on the Citadel. She remembered their first actual kiss in Shepard’s cabin, remembered how her nerves had made her tremble, and how Shepard had stroked her face so softly, whispering sweet reassurances.

So much had changed since then, but one thing hadn’t. Shepard’s love remained constant. If facing the end of the world couldn’t weaken that, nothing would. It was one thing the Reapers couldn’t destroy.

As Shepard laid her carefully on the bed, Liara’s heart felt lighter. Her hands were steady as she stripped off Shepard’s uniform shirt and compression top, pressing kisses to her lips between each layer. She slid out of her labcoat and threw it aside too, coiling her arms around Shepard’s torso so they could feel each others’ bare skin.

There wasn’t any need to speak. Both of them were content as Liara’s hands roamed over the familiar landscape of Shepard’s back, feeling her smooth muscles, the streaky bullet scars. She had several of her own, and Shepard’s fingers found them, as if her touch could heal every old wound.

Their pants came off next, first hers, then Shepard’s. When Shepard’s hands stroked up along her thighs, asking for permission, Liara spread her legs. She might have preferred to go first, but she could tell Shepard needed this the same way she did, and she could not deny her lover anything.

Shepard’s lips started at her ankle, kissing the joint there, then traveled up along her calf to her knee. The trail was slow and torturous, and Shepard often switched sides to give her other leg similar attention. Liara shivered, toes curling on top of the covers, caressing the back of Shepard’s head with her hand. It felt like a defiance of the darkness, to shudder with desire rather than fear.

When Shepard’s teeth pinched the skin just above her knee, still gentle, but present and  _ there _ , Liara gasped and raked her nails lightly over Shepard’s scalp. The back of her skull tingled, a familiar pressure, but she didn’t give in yet. There was no reason to rush this. They had done nothing but rush since the start of the war. She wanted lasting bruises, deep purple marks on her inner thighs, made through time and pressure rather than simple force.

By the time Shepard’s tongue finally arrived at the join of her thigh and her torso, flicking the sensitive crease of skin there, Liara was dripping. Shepard had a way of stirring things within her, of bringing warmth to her body and her heart no matter how cold she felt. She spread her legs further, tilting her hips, not rocking yet, but offering.

Shepard paused, gazing up along her body. Her expression was strange, wistful, but in the end, the only word Liara could use to describe it was grateful. Having lost so much, Shepard was  _ grateful _ for her. Liara wasn’t sure what she had done to earn such importance, but she would accept it without question.

At last, Shepard’s mouth descended. The touch of her tongue was not greedy or desperate, but neither was it tentative. She started with soft strokes, ones she knew would work through practice, and Liara had to fight to keep from coming undone. There was care in each one, in the way Shepard’s tongue swirled against the entrance to her azure, in the way Shepard’s lips sealed around the ridge of her clit.

Masterful. That was it. The way Shepard made love to her was masterful. It was insistent and possessive and selfless and reassuring, pulling in all directions, and Liara had no defense against it. Need pounded in her skull even as her heartbeat dropped between her legs, throbbing in her core.

Liara’s mouth fell open when two of Shepard’s fingers entered her, not meeting any resistance. She sobbed when those fingers curled forward, finding a spot that made her vision flash white. That sob became a sharp cry when Shepard’s mouth found her clit, this time refusing to release it. And when Shepard started moving within her, thrusting slow and hard with the flexing muscles of her forearm, Liara’s eyes went black.

There was no need for “Embrace Eternity”. She had solicited Shepard’s consent so many times that it could be asked for and given without speaking aloud. Shepard’s soul welcomed hers, and Liara threw herself into the storm—a storm whose eye was strangely calm.

All around, she could sense turmoil. Fear, disgust, horror, and despair, all overlaid with dull grey exhaustion. But at the core of the blustering winds was an oasis, a bubble of peace. Liara took shelter there, while in the physical world, Shepard’s unoccupied hand found hers.

_ ‘Thank you,’ _ Shepard thought, and tears flowed freely down Liara’s cheeks. She suddenly understood that she was the shield, the eye of the storm, the small piece of untouched ground that remained. Even while she was falling apart, she was Shepard’s source of strength. Just as Shepard was hers. Perhaps she was not so useless after all.

They moved together then, within the meld and outside of it, merging into one being with enough light to pierce the thickest clouds. Alone, they might be weak, but together, they were strong enough. Liara’s body relaxed for the first time in what felt like years, and she felt Shepard’s spirit do the same, casting the tremendous weight it carried aside for just a moment.

Shepard’s words echoed within her mind:  _ “if I had one wish…” _

Liara offered up everything she had ever hoped for, all she didn’t dare to dream of. She showed Shepard the house, the garden, the small blue baby swaddled in cheerful yellow blankets. She wrote their future in the stars of Shepard’s mind as clearly as she could, as vividly as possible, and prayed to the Goddess she sometimes didn’t believe in that it would be enough to sustain them both.

And for now, it was.

Liara almost didn’t want her climax to come. She wanted to stay here where it was safe, surrounded by love. And Shepard didn’t want to leave either, she could tell, but their bodies had limits, and hers had almost reached several. She pulsed around Shepard’s fingers, twitched beneath her tongue, arching her spine until the small of her back no longer touched the bed.

_ ‘Shepard… I am yours.’ _

The wave of warmth did not crash into her. It merely carried her, flowing around her like the current of an ocean. The powerful pull did not allow her to fight against it, but Liara hardly wanted to. She let herself spread far and wide, safe in the knowledge that she had a guiding star to find her center again. Its light swelled impossibly bright, and Liara knew from the surge of love surrounding her that Shepard had found release as well through the union of their souls.

It took Liara a long time to gather all the pieces of herself again and put them back in order. Shepard had unmade her in order to make  _ them  _ and  _ us, _ and the return to her own mind and body was done only with great reluctance. However, as she pieced herself together again, Liara made sure to keep a piece of Shepard within her as well. She tucked the star safely within her, in a place so deep that even the Reapers could never reach it.

At last, Shepard spoke. Only three words, whispered into the sticky skin of Liara’s thigh. “I’m yours too.”

Liara closed her eyes, stroking Shepard’s damp hair. She still longed for a home, a family, a future far from the war, but… she had this. Shepard was hers. Shepard was hers, and she was Shepard’s, and that would be enough. More than enough.


End file.
